After more than a week of non-blogging days, finally here I am again writing another non-sensible entry hehe...  Bakasyon naman 'di ba(you might ask hehe)??  So what kept me busy these past days?  Well, nakakuha na rin ako finally ng Adobe Photoshop version 7.0 na hiniram ng utol ko sa kaibigan niya, kaya eun hehe, naglaro ako sa Photoshop haha. Kaya kung mapapansin niyo "medyo" nagkaroon na ng bahagyang kaibahan o kulay ang layout ng blog ko compared dati.  Dati 'sus walang kuwenta ang layout ko, kasi walang graphics maliban na lang siguro sa Flash header dati pero ngayon "medyo" meron na at wala na ung Flash header, kaya hindi na masyado DULL hehe...  Nawawala ba ang header, bakit wala(you might ask again hehe)??  Well, under construction pa hehe(just wait for it hehe)..  Salamat nga pala sa napakalupit na innovation na Sliding Doors of CSS, Part II that made my cool navigation possible...  Honestly, I'm having a hard time designing, because this isn't really my thing, talking 'bout pushing myself to the limits, this is one perfect example haha...  In my previous entry, naibahagi ko na pupunta kami(with my friends) sa Bataan, well, sa kasawiang palad sila lang ang nakapunta at HINDI ako, so anong dahilan??  Like I said, due to financial constraint and no need to share further...  Of course, I felt so bad, who wouldn't?  But that was unexpected and nobody wanted that to happen.  Laki talaga ng pagsisisi ko kasi no doubt, sobrang nag-enjoy sila...  

I got my clearance and the day after that I viewed my grades online.  So kumusta naman??  Okay naman sa awa ng Diyos wala ng bagsak at hindi lang siya naawa nagbigay pa siya ng biyaya hehe kasi wala akong tres at wala rin 2.75...  And before I finally got to know my grades, I had hoped for a GOOD grade in Acctg A&B(the subject I've just repeated) and thank God, I got it...  The 2.25 grade in Accounting isn't bad at all and God knows I somehow deserve it despite my chronic procrastination hehe...  It's really funny how I nailed Database Programming(Computer) down over others hehe because I got MY highest grade in this subject.  This wasn't even my major and I was quite nervous on this one because I was so close to failing this due to absences hehe PLUS I actually missed one major hands-on on this subject...  Sabi na lang ng utol ko, life's full of surprises, indeed indeed hehe PLUS I like Computers(surprisingly over my majors haha)...  Sa mga grades ko, OK naman lahat except Law "medyo" hindi ko 'to madaling natanggap because I was expecting a grade which could have been .5 higher than the grade I actually got, talagang mababa lang magbigay si Sir Ngo kahit siya pa ang tatay ko haha...  So much for that.  Sana naman magtuloy-tuloy na at hindi na ako bumagsak pa(sana sana)...  To share further, my mother was MORE worried than me when it comes to this whole idea of passing all my subjects.  Well, I can't blame her hehe, siya ang isa sa mga kumakayod makapagaral lang ako and I just kept telling her that time that don't worry much 'cause I know how I worked it all out and it wasn't at all bad...

I heard that MANY of my former classmates in 3a7 who had hurdled the first sem failed this sem...  Kung tama ang balita ko anim na lang ata silang natirang "regular" out of, ilan ba eun?  Pero despite the missing denominator, 6(?) is such a small number, isn't it??  Kahit papano eh nalulungkot ako sa mga dati kong mga kaklase/kaibigan na bumagsak ngayong sem kasi hindi ko lang alam, kung 'di NARAMDAMAN ko pa ang masakit na feeling kapag bumagsak ang isang tao na talaga namang ibinigay ang lahat pumasa lang...  Isa lang ang gusto kong iparating sa mga kaklase/kaibigan ko na hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin tanggap ang kasawiang 'to(hope they'll read this):

Based sa aking karanasan pagkatapos kong malaman na ako'y bumagsak, I figuratively fell on my knees and almost gave up to stand and this took only a few minutes UNTIL this helping fact popped out from my mind that I have a longer and another sem(a chance) to realize or even prove this out that these crazy knees that let me fall could actually be the same knees that would help me stand(I believe there's nothing else that'll help)...  And guess what, I've just stood up from the ruins that almost ripped my future apart and if ever I'll fall again, at least, I've STILL got that one hell of a realization that'll always jam up my ass hehe ...  Cheer up!  Just when you thought it's all over would actually be the start...

 Ang point ay, ang bagay na sumira sa 'yo ay siya ring bagay na makakatulong sa 'yo.  Don't channel failures to something negative(like delay), channel it to something positive.  Hope this helps enough...

About my top weirdness entry that I promised to write from the previous entry, there will come a time I'll write about it hehe...  This isn't just the proper moment to share 'bout it considering this different mood tonight hehe... 

A friend forwarded me an email a bit long time ago and it really made me laugh hehe.  I guess you can't help to laugh out hard too with their(?) nasty yet entertaining blog posts about the Atrocities of Friendster which already had gone VOLUMES hehe, here's their blog and just find there their seemingly popular entries all about it.  Well, personally, I've kept an account in Friendster for I think more than 2 years now but I don't care if this will be accidentally purged out by whatever means(despite my 365 both real and unreal friends), for this is definitely a NO BIG DEAL for me.  Besides, this wouldn't give me money and most of all this isn't a résumé for me to have a work...  I definitely agree to the bloggers here that Friendster has been the world of superficial acquaintances, though it would really hurt much to those people who were victimized by their silly posts hehe...  Those posts seemingly are meant to entertain...  And in a more serious side, based also from a personal experience, I just can't bargain the kind of idea below which in a way Friendster has to do with it, continue to read(read my own version but humiliating photos aren't present hehe)...

To ALL unconventional Friendsters, honestly bitterness aside, let me kindly lecture you all out.  I was honestly so much entertained not only with some corny crack-ups but most especially with some plainly immature antiques.  If, for instance only, you've been so crazily in love with each other.  There's REALLY no need to prove to the whole world how REAL it is through Friendster 'cause choosing it as a platform to prove this almost sacred stuff out would definitely spoil the whole thing(just prove to each other and please SPARE the world).  So using Friendster, at the first place, seems suicidal enough with regards to showcasing how true your feelings are towards each other(talking 'bout lots of posers invading the whole Friendster thing)...  Come on, what do you all want to mean, really?  If you're just an INDIVIDUAL asking for a friend request and you seem obsessive compulsive enough doing this mantra of how much you love your honey bunch, chicksilog, whatever you may call your own "beloved," it's really tolerable as for me to let you pass but if you JOINTLY share the same account with somebody special(perhaps), doing the same thing would seem utterly joke, this could just be some sort of a simulation of a loving feeling, which, I believe, is IMPROPER...  What a nice start-up to let me know hehe, you all don't need to give me a techie way of presenting this kind of thing(though it somehow entertains me hehe) PLUS I DON'T GIVE A DAMN...  I don't mean to be somewhat rude to all those who already created such account, all I'm saying is that if you just let somebody know in an appropriate PERSONAL level of things, then he'll be able to say, "I'm happy for you two!" but a Friendster damn I apologize for I just can't bargain this kind of idea... 

Simula nang na-hack dati ang Tabulas, naisipan kong LUMIPAT na sa wakas ng bagong tirahan.  Gusto ko ulit mag-Livejournal sa kadahilanang malamang hindi alam ng mga HINDI addict sa blog hopping--maraming magagaling magsulat sa LJ!!!  Gusto ko lang tumira sa LJ hindi dahil magaling din ako kundi para makisama haha...  Pathetic ba hehe??  Biro lang.  Seryoso, gusto kong mag-WordPress sa kadahilanang malamang hindi alam ng mga HINDI addict sa Computers--opensource blogging tool!!!  PERO, wala akong sariling domain para i-setup sana ang pangarap na WP blog.  Kaya pansamantala lamang akong nanirahan sa Tabulas at natuto sa mga huling araw na 'to ang gumawa ng layout.  Hindi ko maitatanggi na napamahal na sa 'kin ang blogging at parte na dito siyempre ang Tabulas bilang aking tahanan sa loob ng mahigit isang taon NGUNIT simula nang na-hack nga ang Tabulas, naisipan ko na medyo hindi SECURED ang pamamalagi ko dito habambuhay sa simpleng kadahilanang ISANG TAO lang ang nagpapatakbo nito...  Hindi naman sa wala akong tiwala sa kanyang angking kagalingan pero 'di ba matalino man ang mantsing, naiisahan din??  Dahil ISANG TAO lang nga, hindi malabong mawala ang buong database ng Tabulas kung sakaling siya'y manakawan ng PC...  Kaya, praktikal lang kaya naisipan kong mag-lipat bahay...

Mahirap sa 'kin ang mag-lipat bahay.  Isang bagay ang nagpahirap sa 'kin at ito ang katanungan sa sarili kong ako ba'y magsusulat na lamang o mag-didisenyo pa rin ng website...  Sa pamamalagi ko sa Tabulas, ako'y natutong gumawa ng website at magsulat na rin(mag-type na rin gamit ang tamang mga daliri na walang tingin hehe).  Dahil ako'y isang Accounting student sa paaralang walang awang kumakatay, ang mag-patuloy pa sa pag-disenyo ng website ay tila PANSAMANTALANG hindi ko muna magagawa... Kaya ako'y nagpasya na HINDI MUNA MAG-ARAL PA sa paggawa ng isang matagumpay na website, kaya para saan pa ang pamamalagi ko sa Tabulas???  Sa pag-sulat ba??  TAMA.  Mawalan man ako ng oras sa sobrang BUSY ay hindi mawawala ang aking hilig sa pag-sulat.  Kaya kung susuriin ang mga bagay na kasasabi ko lang, dito UNA mapupunta: Anong magandang tirahan na puwede kong paglipatan na HINDI na kailangan pang gumawa ng pahirapang TEMPLATE para sa blog??  MALAMANG MARAMI kahit sa Tabulas nga meron e!!!  Pero problema nga lang 'pag may nakikita akong CREATE OWN TEMPLATE or something like that, I don't why I can easily be tempted...  Dahil hilig ko nga ang magsulat, anong matinong pwedeng paglipatan??  LJ nga 'di ba??  Puwede, pero dahil man has unlimited wants sabi nga sa basic Economics, ano pa bang pwedeng paglipatan hmm??  AHA.  Ung mukhang paid domain o professional-looking domain PERO LIBRE...  Sa wakas, I believe it's destiny that brought me here, sa aking bagong tirahan na no doubt HINDI LANG maganda ang itsura ng domain name ang LUPIT pati ng blogging features dito, siyempre to suit what I need as of now--NO HARD-CODING, goodbye muna dito hehe...  Sakay na sa bago kong tirahan and don't forget to update your links...

rcdarang.i.ph

Post-script: This Tabulas blog will still be open until its "closure" roughly by end of April.  This 68th entry has just made history being the LAST...

Forgive me for being so damn INdecisive, but I've just decided to stay here in Tabulas hehe .  I just can't get over with web designing.  Hindi ko man lang naisip na kahit manakawan ng PC 'tong si Roy(the creator of Tabulas), hindi naman siya ganon siguro katanga na makalimutan ang "basic" na 'to--BACK-UP.  Forgive me Roy for underestimating your capacity from my previous post hehe(that's plainly joke, of course I don't underestimate hehe).  I was just a bit overwhelmed by the cool features in I.PH especially its cool-looking domain name BUT as I browse the blogs there, halos masuka na ako sa SAWA hehe, kasi halos pare-pareho sila ng template(You just can't create your own there.  Maybe I'll keep my I.PH account for a while for future "indecisiveness" haha).  Isa pa, na-realize ko bigla na matagal ko rin pinaghirapan ang header ko sa taas pati na rin ang navigation.  Kaya sayang naman 'di ba kung hindi ako magpatuloy manirahan dito??  PLUS, personally, I'm very much contented with Tabulas' cool(if not perfect) features that any bloggers in this world, both amateur and professional, can agree with.  If there would only be one thing a good blogging service must offer, for me, it shall always allow users to create their own template aside from offering just a boring standard one.  And Tabulas has it.  I also like very much the very idea of how Roy has this "personal attachment" to those who've availed of his service when he blogs not only about the FUTURE of Tabulas but also his personal ramblings which almost every blogger in this world does.  It feels quite comforting to know that a robot doesn't run the whole thing ehehe.  So much for that, the bottom line is I'll stay here for quite long until rcdarang.com finally pollutes the cyberspace hehe(looking forward for this to open-up hopefully when I become a professional, hmm not necessarily to become one, kahit magkaPERA lang hehe).

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How's my hellish(plus the fact of summer heat) summer class(you might ask hehe)??  Well, ok, as of now, we already had THREE tests, 1 in FS, and 2 in MS.  2/3 results were already given and not that HIGH but passing, but the third test in MS about Budgeting, I really don't think I did well on that exam(result's not yet given, obviously 1/3's remaining hehe).  Because my EYES just didn't cooperate!  When I had entered the class before I took the Budgeting test, I believed my body was 100% conditioned(parang si Manny hehe) plainly because my mind was somewhat prepared(I had reviewed damn hard).  And I've never had an annoying running nose BUT that had only lasted a couple of minutes right before I started reading the first question(what a perfect timing hehe).  PLUS, I don't know what went wrong with my eyes, I just can't properly read the letters(parang nadudoleng ang lolo), I had overlooked some items because of that but thankfully I had known them before I finalized the answers and passed it, but still I don't know if I overlooked some MORE waaahhh.  I've had some major eye problems(like I always share) and I think that's the main reason why my eyes didn't just cooperate.  With my ASTIGMATIC eyes, my eyes struggled to move from one line to another(tsk).  PLUS some of my classmates especially those who're taking the MS subject twice had already got a LEAKAGE, not just an ordinary leakage, but they had the EXACT copy of the very exam, meaning the exam I took was just REcycled and some of my classmates unfairly had it(what an exact reviewer they got hehe), and of course, the HELL with their would-be high scores, it was absolutely UNFAIR!!!  BUT it's ok as long as they know how to answer any questions about Budgeting fairly well, I guess I don't have problems with that if that's the case, but just for the sake of creating a level-playing field, I call the College to please as much as they've been aware about it, DON'T RECYCLE!!!  And let's see who can GREATLY get the answers right with such sheer preparation UP for any surprises hehe.

I've been watching PBB since its conception and so I watch this undoubtedly popular PBB teen edition(despite the hellish summer class).  I want to react about Aldred's case(whom, I think, would like to voluntarily exit).  I think there's one BIG thing maybe all social people can't just comprehend--the whole situation an INTROVERT usually has.  Very much like Aldred's case in PBB.  I don't have time to research again through internet what DETAILED psychological condition Aldred has been trying to resolve to save his self because his case is way CLEAR to me and let me pull that "RESOLVE" word out for I think no matter how hard he tries, despite(not only a verbally-proven thing) every circumstances surrounding him inside the house are totally ON HIS SIDE, he just can't get out from his own BOX!  As many say it, there's a clear trade-off between high intelligence level and the social aspect of a dork's being, this somehow is a contributing factor.  I want to react MORE about Aldred(not on Kim despite her charismatic figure inside the house no matter how I'd really like to hehe) because I honestly can see my very self on Aldred long years back and just a bit now.  Want me to share?(you might be interested hehe).  Well, here's my own...

As far as I can remember I haven't still shared to you my early childhood dilemma starting when I first entered schooling.  Many might wonder that despite this shameful fact that I'll be turning 21 this December, I'm still a third year college student which I think I should've been in my last year now.  Not because I took many of my subjects twice or many times but because I wanted to delay myself because my younger brother who's 2 years younger than me was still not going to school.  So as it turned out, I waited for him roughly a year interval instead of rightfully sending my ass to school in advance before he does.  For a reason that I don't want to go to school without him because I didn't want to meet new friends or in more broad terms--I still didn't want to socialize.  Yes, I'm basically not a social person maybe a bit up to now.  I believe that it's NOT normal for a child who doesn't like to meet new friends especially in his first day or shall I say first time in school.  You might wonder why or what the hell WAS wrong with me.  Pehaps, it's proper to say that I just can't reason out for the way I just am.  As a child, I didn't still know why and now because I'm already a grown-up, part of the rigid process is to assess oneself or in a more spiritual level-know oneself.  So, I've tried to answer those questions troubling my being.  To cut the story short, like I've just said, I just can't reason my introverted situation out but it doesn't mean that I can't get out from my damn box regardless of the unknown reason.  To try giving all of you a sound reason, well I think insecurity mainly revolves around an introvert being and I guess that was a pretty good reason no matter how simple.  Maybe Aldred has had enough and just chose to exit from the house that almost suffocated him to social death but in my own story, I fought or will fight hard to get myself out from my damn BOX!!!  My story of being an introvert, I believe, still continues a bit up to now but thankfully not as GRANDER as my early childhood days that I've just shared.  In fact just yesterday, I've had just all the guts to sing in a corny amusement center in front of many strangers hahaha(with my girl classmate for a duet haha).  Take NOTE katalsik-laways(hehe), not just in a boxed videoke booth, but outside it where my face(which resembles Sir Ngo) was actually on a big screen as if I were having my time in my life entertaining strangers feeling like a rockstar though singing a mushy love song haha.  Can you dig that suckaaahhh*insert Booker T's entrance song here* hehe??  I guess that's one good way to release oneself out from the box, fight insecurity, and ultimately gain confidence.  Well, that's my incomplete yet complete story that I was BASICALLY so shy when I was in my early childhood days that I even didn't bother to fight back when my classmate in Kinder poked me with a sharp pencil closely below my eye(that Kinder nemesis became my very best friend when we were in Elementary, his name is Marlo).  Point is, every breathing being is ALWAYS a big fish ONCE in a small pond(I guess we all have experienced our introverted side) but it's pretty abnormal for a big fish to ALWAYS swim in a small pond for the rest of its life because eventually as far as the law of mathematical proportion is concerned, a big fish shall live in an ocean(idea from the movie Big Fish).  Plus the fact that if you try swimming for the rest of your life in any body of water inversely proportionate to your dreams, you're NOT GROWING!  Kaya Aldred, puta naman, 'wag kang ganyan, sabi nga ni Fred "tatanda ka niyan kaagad" sus me mga bata pa kayo.  Try to think of this Aldred(hope you can drop by my blog), kung sa maliit nga na mundo sa loob ng bahay ni Kuya, hindi mo kayang makitungo sa kanila, paano pa kaya sa mas malaking tunay na mundo sa labas??

On one CRAZY hand, I always fantasized myself inside Big Brother's house with my celebrity crush Nicole Hernandez being one of my housemates, yeahhh it would not only destroy the introvert within me but unleash the animal in me, wraaarrr haha