One of my life's greatest analogies is a faucet with a filter and a water that runs through it.  A filter, the cheap one I saw when I was a kid, could be plugged on the spout and this sifts the water from any contaminant like a virus.  Why can it be considered as life's great analogy, if not the greatest?  My answer is quite simple.  The functioning brain is like a running water and if the latter is a popular renewable energy, so is the former when it renews brain cells.  But sometimes a brain couldn't just have a filter of its own just like a water which doesn't run through even the cheapest filter one could buy at the grocery store.  The result could be damaging, just imagine drinking water from a faucet full of contaminants which could lead to serious illness.  Same goes with our minds(more appropriate term I believe), if we don't get a "filter" for them to keep our negative thoughts from coming, the result is likewise a disaster especially when it comes to relating with people.  Here's my story that happened years back.

I watched the movie House of Wax for two reasons.  ONE is I had a deep infatuation to its main actress, Elisha Cuthbert.  I even wrote an exclusive blog entry all about her(but I once nuked all my entries then and that entry was one of them) and I even thought of making a website dedicated to her just like one crazy fan site.  But to be a bit defensive, I'VE GROWN!  Hehe.  TWO, I watched that movie with the only girl I used to love by far.  I've shared countless times that this girl rebuffed me for a DEEP reason which has been uncertain to me up to this very day.  She let me court her, like giving me even the slightest chance to lay my subtle yet pure intention onto the table in every joyful fx ride with her but all of a sudden, she sadly cut it and God was I hurt!  I bent my knees(figuratively) chanting profusely pathetic statement that goes a little something like this: I can wait.  But she just didn't permit me to.  Was I oozing with self-pity, a martyr, or plain pathetic?  Well, inevitably at first.  I'm making myself stronger everyday by religiously humming to a tune of, "I'm RC and I'm NO pathetic!"  And months after, I asked her out and that's when we watched House of Wax together just before the new school year started when I was about to take Accountancy major.  And after that wonderful moment I texted her by saying, "Just believe me that I loved you and I'll be alright."  And she replied, "Yes, I believe."  And that's basically how it ended.  I just can't be friends with her though because she's simply more than that.  I'm almost close to forgetting her but the whole experience itself of plummeted self-esteem or of being unwanted has been the theme of my every dream.  Well again inevitably at first.  And after that this is where the whole "filter" analogy comes into life.  It's blatantly "negative" to tangle oneself as a result of a painful experience.  Suicide has been a reality because people are just unable to filter their strong negative thoughts from the simple solace that there would be something, somewhere out there, and someone you really deserve.  There's a time for everything and you just can't rush things out.  The words are IN TIME.  Sadly it's a reality that happiness could be sometimes beyond one's control.  But that's pure fallacy!  Because happiness could be achieved at least by people who don't allow their drinking glasses of water susceptible to contaminants from an unfiltered source.  Just don't let your depleting negative thoughts muddle through your greatest renewable energy called "positive energy" and everything else would seamlessly flow into your favor.  That's what I did when I failed a big Accounting subject turning it around and I'm still here surviving.  That's what I did when I was rejected turning it around and I got a courage asking her out still.  Conclusion is, aside from Accounting, my other expertise is "turning-around" though it still would depend on the cooperation of the other hehe.  Turn-around has many meanings but to simplify the task of the readers it just means changing for the better, leaving the past behind without bitterness.  Familiar with the idiom turn over a new leaf?  Let me go now to a more recent story still within the context of this entry so I'll try as hard as I could not to deviate.  This is a little deep so take a deep breathe hehe.

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Many things have happened since the last time I blogged. Almost every day was a highlight, almost everyday was worth blogging for. And writing them all here would just be too random for my slow "brain processor" to execute simultaneously. But, of course, there's nothing in this world that can't be narrowed down. Right? Ok, let me start off with the most recent going down to the least but I guess the most recent one would be too long enough for an entry. So I'll limit myself to that. Well, my fourth year has just ended and don't you ever piss me off by saying any form of congratulatory words(and to my girl admirers, asking for my grad pic haha joke ) 'cause it's not yet my time to move away from College hehe. I still have ONE more year left! A few but weighty units, to be spread over a YEAR, has a quotient horrendous enough to be spitted on. But looking at the bright side, I could slack more haha. The triumphant Baccalaureate Mass held at the UST grounds 2 days ago was enough to trigger a spurt of bitterness in me. Haha, that was pun intended! You wanna know what I really felt that time? Actually, I hadn't felt so sad witnessing my batchmates with a red balloon tied on their hands, looking cute, who were setting foot on a step closer to the biggest stage perhaps of their lives UNTIL my brother showed me an image, from a certain photo site, creatively shot depicting one glorious moment of those UST students who're about to depart sooner and finally get the taste of what "real" life is all about, yeah. I was whispering while witnessing all of them words like these: I should've been celebrating with them, I'm originally a batch 2007. I can't put into words how really sad it feels to be in a joyful atmosphere hardly finding any reason to be just happy with them. And regretful thoughts came dashing into my head like just WHY, God, I FAILED. Hehe, sometimes I'd ask a scripted line like this, "What have I done to deserve this kind of misery?" Haha. Then I dealt with it in a logical perspective to control the pour of my sad emotion. I failed NOT really because of Sir Muñez(yeah, I stated your name, I'm that bitter hehe) because some of my classmates passed Accounting A&B with him as a prof. I started to realize that I failed because I'm NO resourceful. Resourceful in a sense that I was actually studying, during the first sem in my third year, TOO LAX. I didn't gather much photocopied materials of practice problems, I just read the textbook and relied on every single example from it, and that was basically it, I didn't even answer those multiple choice questions every after lesson. The trend was I was getting a fairly good grade in theories, but I paid a huge toll to the problems. I was too damn complacent despite the prof's popular irregularity and so I deserve at least half of my failure, or maybe more than half. And so I'm now tasting the bitter effects of my complacency, NOT tying my bitter ass to the resources that I could've gathered. Accounting is pretty much a course of IMMUNITY. I mean, I don't doubt people who have a superior IQ to get the problem in the end 'cause it's a matter of logic. And if you have the "brain" it takes to untangle your way out of complexities, then you're up for a show. However, one can't just depend on his masterful logic because solving problems has "time" as its essence. So to successfully race against time would require anyone to PRACTICE or what I personally call IMMUNIZE so that inefficiency won't block the way. I believe that I still haven't learned totally from this mistake. It's NOT that I'm one chronic slack(I was just sharing that I am for humorous purposes hehe), it's just that I'm simply not as passionate as my batchmates who've survived or even my beloved classmates who still are trying to put their/our heads above drowning water. I've shared countless times that taking up Accounting didn't even cross my mind. Yes, I could adjust but I believe it'd go against my very nature to saturate myself with the dizzying numerical details of a firm for instance. I literally am becoming a little dizzy everytime I'm looking at the whiteboard due to my serious eye defect. I just can't see what's written on it, to tell you the truth, I survived Cost Accounting, as much as I could bear, without looking at the whiteboard so I was mainly relying on my ears. I failed Process Cost essentially because of it and that's why I just resorted to building my own method with the notes of my classmate "as my base" on hand. So my eye defect is collectively a factor. The only saving grace is the fact that I love anything about business. I read a lot of business books like that of Kiyosaki's and actually the book that inspired me during third year high to consider Economics was Lynch's Learn to Earn. You need not study Accounting in order to build one business empire that would last 'cause it'd start from your passion(what you love doing) and everything else like your target market and competency would naturally follow. In a nutshell, my dream to build my own business is what has kept me to hold on to this course. And there's NO single thing I regret. Besides, who wouldn't like to become a business savvy and technically-sexy of financial figures at the same time? Damn, I'm so sexy haha(Sir Cabrera butts in saying, "Ano ba 'tong English mo, technically-sexy?" wahaha). God is so good that He let me go this far, though I'm not sure if I'd still be needing a "retake" of IAC3 or any other. My warmest Congratulations to my batchmates/friends

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My affluent Uncle, Daddy Wong, a commonplace Chinese businessman, who's been helping Basaynons(people of the town Basey, Western Samar) in many ways possible through his commercial ingenuity within "rural" bounds has just passed away. May the transporter of people from the town to the city of Tacloban, Leyte through his DM jeeps rest in peace.